A CBeebies hotel run by a load of hairy monsters and Big Bird has a strict no pet policy, it has emerged.

The hotel which has a half star rating on Trip Advisor is fraught with issues, with owners Funella and Fergus Furchester coming under a lot of pressure to make significant improvements.

Funella said: “There’s a number of problems that we’re looking at. Our improvement strategy is to look at customer comments on Trip Advisor and implement some sort of plan.

“One of the issues is fucking Cookie Monster eating all the resident’s food when he takes it to their rooms. But he’s Elmo’s mate and I don’t have the heart to send him back to Sesame Street, especially with all the addiction problems there.

“Finding lots of fur in the rooms is an issue, we have beds lined in the stuff and the sinks are constantly being blocked. So we obviously banned pets.”

Recent customer feedback has indicated the issues haven’t gone away, with the smell of wet dog being replaced by the smell of old monsters. Equally, visitors continue to report bright red fur making its way onto all of the linen.

Head of Housekeeping Elmo said: “Elmo has nothing to do with the fur. Fur loss is definitely not down to Elmo’s heroin problem when he lived in Manhattan.” 

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