A Swansea man has spotted an opportunity to exploit the recent press around Vitamin D deficiencies and turn it into a hilarious chat up line to use over the weekend.
Singleton Pete Bowen from Killay has been single for two years and despite frequenting bars every weekend and holding an impressive 100% swipe right ratio on Tinder, is failing to get beyond an occasional slap in the face.
Pete said: “It’s been two long years of no female interaction. I’ve tried everything, from drunkenly groping women I don’t know to using abusive, sexual obscenities.
“Some tart told me I need to change tact a little, maybe try and be a bit more ‘respectful’ and strike up a ‘conversation’ or something but that all seems a bit false to me.
“I’m interested in the news and read The Sun every day because the picture to word ratio is so high and when I saw a headline about Vitamin D I got to thinking about how I could use this to my benefit.
“At the moment it’s a toss-up between “I’m lacking a bit of Vitamin U, do you want to Vitamin C me and I’ll give you the Vitamin D?” and “I’m going to Vitamin D-stroy you.”
photo credit: Lara Cores <a href=”http://www.flickr.com/photos/57375589@N05/29081702660″></a> via <a href=”http://photopin.com”>photopin</a> <a href=”https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-nd/2.0/”>(license)</a>