A middle class woman from Langland has been spotted on Newton Road in Mumbles not wearing Joules or Fat Face brand clothing.
Mum-of-two Theresa Connell seemed almost nonchalant as she paraded past a busy Jones Bar wearing what looked like a combination of H&M, Topshop and ASOS own brand clothing and accessories.
Theresa said: “I kind of fell into the whole Joules and Fat Face thing because all the other Mums up the school were wearing it.
“I looked at myself in the mirror one day and as I zipped up ‘that’ navy Fat Face gilet everyone has I just wondered why I looked so fucking stripy and nautical.
“I really didn’t think there’d be an issue buying some clothes that weren’t navy and white, or mustard coloured that didn’t have an anchor or ghastly pink flowers on them, how wrong was I?”
Onlooker Cheryl Gray said: “I didn’t know what to make of her. At first I thought it was quirky, but after speaking to my friends in Jones Bar, I realised her outlandish look of ripped skinny jeans and animal print jacket just didn’t belong in the area.
“I’d have been OK with some John Lewis or White Stuff, even wearing some expensive workout gear despite not actually doing any exercise. Frankly she looked like she belonged in the Uplands.”
Theresa added: “I’ve been completely ostracised. Some women have even stopped their husbands from speaking to me in case I influence them into buying cheaper and more stylish clothes for their partners.
“Sometimes I put a parka jacket and trainers on and wander around the house thinking about the good old days of judgement free fashion.
“When Seasalt and White Stuff arrive in Mumbles I may have to move.”