Construction workers who demolished the old Oceana nightclub on the Kingsway have revealed they found a woman’s lost dignity during the process.

Work on the site was a massive success, with the Council’s target of overspending on commercial ventures exceeded by millions of pounds as planned.

In addition to finds like asbestos, an unopened packet of Lambert & Butler and a fully working glow stick, the workers hit upon something personal belonging to Theresa Connell from Llansamlet.

Site Manager Pete Bowen said: “It was like when they open the briefcase on Pulp Fiction and they’re met with that glow.  Only this one was covered in pubic hair and stank of shame.

“We located it in the old men’s toilets, so I’m guessing whatever Theresa was doing in there at the time soon turned a bit sordid.”

Theresa said: “Oh my God right, I’ve been looking for that for like ages. I thought I’d left it in Maga that year, but losing it in Oceana would explain my behaviour.

“I could’ve done with having this over the last 9 years, to be honest. I’ve done some pretty shameful things, cringing like!

“Never mind, what’s done is done. Which is exactly what I told Bonymaen RFC’s youth team when I left their changing rooms in 2009.”

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