An elderly woman has shocked the street she lives on by using two-thirds of her fortnightly black bin bag allowance, we can reveal.
Pensioner Theresa Connell from Loughor consistently shames her neighbours with her fastidious approach to recycling, neatly positioning one black and one pink bag next to each with matching knots.
Neighbour Pete Bowen said: “Every other week I’m lugging out three ripped black bags full of shitty nappies and items that could probably be recycled.
“Usually I look to my left and there’s these pristine bags which I imagine are sprayed with some floral perfume, a barely full black bag and a pink bag where she’s gone and taken all the fucking labels off her plastics. It’s insane.
“This week was different, I thought I was dreaming. Two black bags, I even had to knock on Rob at number 43 to come and have a look.”
Rob Gray from number 43 added: “Pete couldn’t even speak coherently when I opened the door, he was in a state of shock. He stank of sewerage and had brown liquid residue on his fingers, so I knew straight away this was bin related.
“I followed him across the road, looked, then fell back on Colin from number 11s Honda Civic.
“Part of me wanted to tear the bag open to see what delights lay in there, a stray bottle of milk? Full can of pilchards which had gone off? Porn?”
Theresa continued: “I had a bit of a clear out and decided to throw away my old Kwik Save carrier bags and decided to separate them from my bottle caps and shredded junk mail.
“I popped the second bag out, went inside to get some polish so I could make the food bin look shiny and all my neighbours were outside stood around and my rubbish.
“Fortunately none of them have been inside my house because my bins look presentable but I’m actually a massive hoarder.”
photo credit: Andrew Gustar <a href=”http://www.flickr.com/photos/62283967@N05/16215526035″>Bin End</a> via <a href=”http://photopin.com”>photopin</a> <a href=”https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nd/2.0/”>(license)</a>