An obnoxious mum has shocked coffee shop customers by loudly reading The Daily Mail to her 11 year old son.
Theresa Connell, 42, sat oppositeson Robert with a flat white and gluten free brownie on Monday afternoon, announcing her disgust at the amount of women who drive cars nowadays and how brown people and liberals are destroying capitalist utopia.
Theresa said: “My baby Robbie has a thirst for current affairs and The Mail is like his Pellegrino, so we visit a common coffee shop called Costa after school every day so we can hate everything and snigger at people wearing high-vis.
“We had a very healthy debate the other day about how we love our financial advisor more than Aunt Carol, because Carol drinks Carling from the can and married badly.”
Onlooker Pete Bowen said: “I’m fairly sure reading right wing newspapers to 11 year olds is a form of child abuse. Not only that but the ‘hot chocolate’ she bought him was skinny and sugar free, or in other words a cup of skimmed milk.
“She was telling her son that women belong at home and that it was up to him to earn loads of money so he could land himself a wife who was just like her.”
Robert Connell said: “Most of my friends play computer games but I have to discuss hard Brexit and the benefits of privatising public services. She keeps calling me her baby in public and she’s very loud.
“I just want to go home, watch Spider-Man on YouTube and fast forward to a time where I can smoke weed and drink gin as a form of escapism.”