Coventry is set to feel the wrath of Mother Nature and angry mother f*ckers from Swansea with boxing gloves on.

The Midlands City announced yesterday as the 2021 City of Culture, which we didn’t want anyway, will have a short lived celebration as cold weather and a minibus of amateur boxers make their way up there to remind them who’s boss.

Funky Pumper Pete Bowen said: “They may take our culture title, but they’ll never survive a pounding from the pumpers.

“We’re going to take a mix tape from Room 2 Escape and cardio the living the crap out of them.”

Bag class member Theresa Connell said: “They think they’re so special and cultural with their Lady Godiva riding her horse naked through their town centre like a million years ago. That happens in Penlan every day.

“I went to Coventry once, it has a City Centre which was bombed to pieces in the war and has been very poorly reconstructed. Doesn’t sound like anywhere I know.”

Storm Caroline added: “I got your back Swansea.

“I’m going to take them back to the ice age with my arctic wind and I’ll even chuck two minutes of snow on Cardiff, build their hopes up, then rain solidly all weekend.”

photo credit: MShades <a href=”http://www.flickr.com/photos/23054755@N00/9454084512″>Lady Godiva</a> via <a href=”http://photopin.com”>photopin</a&gt; <a href=”https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nd/2.0/”>(license)</a&gt;

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