Former UKIP leader and political nobody Nigel Farage has called for the return of the bendy bus in Swansea.

Farage, keen to maintain personal relevance, made the announcement after the Kingsway had already started to be dug up and changes were already being made.

Farage said: “I was always against the bendy bus in Swansea because it was synonymous with words like ‘boulevard’ and ‘metro’, which sound foreign.

“It’s important that I remain, for want of a better word, in the picture and very relevant because if I just stay at home alone, accumulating wealth through my EU pension and watching Doctors, I feel really empty.

“I need to feed my narcissistic personality and be on TV. I don’t care if it’s Bay TV or Made in Cardiff, where I’ve backed the complete demolition of John Lewis.”

Swansea Council spokesperson Pete Bowen said: “Well he’s said it now so I’m sure it’ll happen. The Potter’s Wheel have already had bendy bus themed beer mats delivered.

“With all his bullshit and time wasting I’m surprised he hasn’t ever been employed by the Tories. Wait. Unless?”

Farage continued: “Have you seen the length on those buses? They’re so long I’ve told my friend Donald with the small hands about them.

“Could probably add a few zeros to all that NHS money too.”

photo credit: ndl642m <a href=”http://www.flickr.com/photos/30581663@N05/30227540602″>Swansea – Wales</a> via <a href=”http://photopin.com”>photopin</a&gt; <a href=”https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-nd/2.0/”>(license)</a&gt;

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