The Television Match Official from Saturday’s game against England has carefully analysed the evidence and concluded that today is Thursday.

In addition, the TMO has managed to clarify that the World is flat, vaccinations make your teeth fall out and the Conservative Government are doing an excellent job.

TMO Pete Bowen said: “I don’t understand why everyone’s feeling so glum today, it’s Friday tomorrow.

“Officials like me come into a lot of criticism, but people need to understand that when you have to make decisions in the slowest possible time with absolute ease of clarity, it can be hard.

“That being said, what I say goes, so enjoy the penultimate day before the weekend and this wonderful summer we’re having.”

England coach Eddie Jones added: “I can’t stand people who criticise decisions that go my way.

“Did you hear about all the criticism Mike Brown has had? Imagine trying to intimidate a player like that for your own gain, it’s disgusting.”

TMO Bowen added: “Eddie’s right, Mike Brown is definitely a wonderful addition to the game and is definitely not a twat.”

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