A group of men from a Swansea Golf Club are going on a ‘golf tour’ to Pattaya to definitely just play golf and are by no means a group of seedy old bastards.

The group of twelve, who are mostly married and mostly over 50, are making their annual trip to Thailand having negotiated with their partners that this kind of thing is perfectly respectable for men like them.

Golfer Pete Bowen, 53, said: “Of all the places in the World that have golf courses we picked Pattaya because, erm, well it’s got reasonably priced golf clubs to hire. Yes, that’s the one I used, that’s plausible.

“It most certainly isn’t inappropriate that we’ll be having the occasional shandy on Walking Street and I’ll be leering at girls who are young enough to my Granddaughter, it helps me focus on my handicap.”

Pete’s friend Rob Gray, 49, said: “I got so pissed last year I didn’t realise I had two of them in my room until I found the other one stuck under my massive beer belly the following morning. It was really funny, but I didn’t tell my wife and kids about that because I like to play the big man but really I’m a bit pathetic.

“As far as the family are concerned I’m going for the golf and find my inner Buddhist, I’ll certainly be seeking some sort of forgiveness by the end of the tour from some higher power, so why not?”

Rob’s wife Cheryl added: “They all walk around thinking their powerful because they’re members of a golf club and have mildly successful careers, but trips like this just highlight how disgusting they all are.

“I let Rob go because it means he’s in a different country to me and there’s more chance of him disappearing for good over there.”


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