The reunions lined up for former Swansea nightclub Barons will present a perfect opportunity to catch up with exes and one night stands over children spawned during the 80s and 90s, organisers have promised.

Present at both reunions will be a special ‘Born from Barons’ soundproofed booth, where couples will be able to reacquaint themselves and discuss the goings on and money owed for children born in the Barons era, many of who have children themselves.

46 year old Pete Bowen from Plasmarl said: “It was a different time back then; I’d have unprotected sex at least twice a week with a Barons woman, who may or may not have been a barren woman. Things changed when AIDS was invented in ’86 and I tried harder to pull out, but by then the damage was done.

“We’d often set out with good intentions and try our luck in the Valbonne or Martha’s, but the women there really made you work for it. So we’d usually end up in Barons and by 2:00am Sunday morning I’d be on my way home with a satisfied smile.

“I never envisaged a reunion; you don’t when you’re young.”

55 year old Theresa Connell said: “I can’t wait for the Barons reunions! They’ll be nostalgic; I’ll see some old faces, dance to some 80s classics and hopefully bump into the father of my child.

“I think his name was Rob, he had one of those distinguished moustaches Swansea men had in the 80s and was wearing a very poorly fitted, baggy suit with the sleeves rolled up.

“He was very Miami Vice, which is why I disappeared with him down an alleyway off Castle Street 32 years ago and 9 months later Sonny was born. I called him Sonny after James Crockett.”

44 year old Rob Gray added: “I’ll be going; I just hope I don’t bump into Townhill Theresa after all these years.

“Fortunately I still have my old getup from back in the day, which I’m sure won’t make me stand out and then have some secret revealed to me.”

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