A Hafod Mam has declared Christmas officially open by getting stressed, bossing her family about and starting to drink wine when the big and little hands reach 12.

Mam of three Theresa Connell, 39, started this years’ festivities yesterday by shouting at her family about cheese while opening a bottle of Aldi red.

Theresa said: “I was stressing over having enough cheese in the house and my husband said ‘Cheesus Christ’, as if this is some happy time of year where jokes and laughter are appropriate.

“Being irrational and making everyone on edge is what Christmas is all about. It’s not a time to relax, not for everyone around me at least.”

Theresa’s husband Pete said: “I’m constantly in trouble in the run up to the big day and attempts to lighten the mood with witty puns aren’t welcome. But it’s all I have.

“Every year I go to the shops and intentionally don’t buy something from ‘the list’, saying the shop ran out. It gives me an excuse to go back out again and sit in a car park for half an hour where I’ll smoke some cigarettes.”

Theresa’s son Frankie, 6, said: “Mammy gives us a pack of baby wipes and tells us to go around the house wiping things while she has her grown up squash.”